I had planned to go earlier, but I ended up scrambling to write a news story, then I fell asleep on the sofa, and then it was 2 p.m. and the boys were going to be home at 3:15, so I just waited and took them with me.
After I had made the decision to take the boys shopping with me, a neighbor lady called and asked me to read the journaling she was putting in a scrapbook for a friend. I set up the appointment at 5 p.m.
Wal-Mart was it’s usual nightmare of freaky folks, slow-moving grandmas and mothers with children (I currently fall into the latter category, but I am on the edge of the first and second category, as well).
I ran into a ya-ya in the cookie aisle, and while our children ran up and down the cookies and other shoppers shot us dirty looks she gave me some coupons ~$2 off Contessa frozen dinners, yehaw!
Then I came to the checkout line and picked a spot. I did not make a good decision.
I looked at my phone and realized it was 4:47 p.m. and there was a lady with a cart overflowing with goods and children in front of me. So I called my appointment and pushed it back to 5:30 p.m.
After I loaded my goodies onto the conveyer belt and was properly pinned in by another shopper behind me I realized I was in “Dons” line. Don is probably 80 years old and, I swear this is true, reads the labels of every product as he scans it.
I had several multiple item purchases, milk, bottled water, binders (cool looking and on sale!) and in each case I told him how many of each item I had in the cart. Undaunted Don scanned each item separately.
We walked out of the store at 5:13 p.m. I knew I wouldn’t get the groceries put away before my guest arrived, but there was a chance I would get the car unloaded.
So we pull into the carport and tumble out grabbing packages as we go. The cat came to greet us, and stood in the doorway, waiting for me to unlock it so she can go in it first.
We dumped packages on the table, and in the process, a saucer left on the table crashed to the tile floor and shattered.
I’m sweeping and swearing lightly under my breath, DS-7 is scrambling to pick up coats and backpacks in the living room and DS-12 is finishing unloading the car.
But we made it.
When she came to the door the glass was off the floor, so were the school supplies.
DS-12 unloaded groceries and put them away while I helped my neighbor.
And I vowed never to go to Wal-Mart again. ….. until tomorrow when I run out of double sided tape or realize I forgot to purchase laundry detergent.
Just a quick layout about my 12-year-old DS. He wrote the equations on the page.
"Who would have thought I would bring a math wizard
into this world. I am hard pressed to balance my check-book, and I only do it
under duress. I was fine in my number-free world, then along came my first born
son, methodical, logical, technical L----.
"The boy loves numbers, math and all things
scientific. He took first place in the school science fair while he was in first
grade. Instead of watching sports, he has the television tuned to MythBusters or
Numb3rs. He hates to get up early, but willingly gives up 30 minutes of sleep
twice a week to attend an advanced math class.
"When he and his father get talking math problems I
just smile and go somewhere else in my head. I’ll let them discuss negative
numbers, integers and Pi while I think about my next newspaper story or